Thursday, March 23, 2006

Despisition

I despise cleaning checks.  Despise!  On a very simplistic level I dislike them for the following reasons:

  1. I don’t like cleaning.

  2. They have the remarkable ability of scheduling them at the worst possible times.  This is usually during testing weeks.  This month they avoided testing days, but scheduled it so I’d have to do my cleaning on my birthday.  Blasphemy!

  3. The work is never equitably distributed.

  4. The cleaning standards fluctuate dramatically, even with the same management.  I’ve failed when my house was immaculate and passed when we put hardly any effort into it.

  5. You don’t get candy like you do during mission cleaning checks.

  6. In order to pass the test you make the house uninhabitable.  You’ll fail if there are dirty dishes in the dishwasher.  You’ll fail if there is a hair in the sink (I’ve had both happen in case you think I exaggerate.)  You have to clean the house and immediately quarantine it so no one can defile it until they decide to come inspect it.

  7. Inspectors are never there when they say they will be.

  8. There’s no way to contact the actual inspector (who is usually someone other than the landlord) either before or after the fact.

I could rant further, but I think 8 points shows that I do in fact have an argument as to why I should hate cleaning checks.  However, the reason I despise cleaning checks is on moral grounds.  Why should we have them in the first place?  We are paying to live in these less-than-stellar apartments.  Why should they get to regulate the exact manner in which we live?  I understand their concern that we don’t damage the property.  However, the things that cleaning checks inspect (is there dust on the windowsill? Are the burners of the stove spotless?) don’t really relate to us damaging the property.  Furthermore, we are held liable for any damage they find after we move out.  Even if we trashed the place, we’d end up paying for in the end.  Why do they need to inconvenience us every month when there really is no consequence for them whether we pay in time now or money later?  It makes no sense.  They’re trying to take away our agency.  I hate diabolical cleaning checks!

Song of the moment: “Lose Myself” Depeche Mode

3 comments:

Emily said...

I think someone in Provo should start a cleaning-check cleaning service. How much would you and your roommates pay to not have to think about cleaning checks?

Someone could clean up (monitarily).

Catherine Elizabeth said...

Don't you know Christopher better than that? He wouldn't pay for anything he could get for free, even if it means manual labor.

Jeanette said...

I agree. Plus, when I had mono and thus realistically could not do my cleaning checks, I got a fine. It was only 5 bucks, but it was the principle of it all... we argued with management, because cleaning check people are stupid.