Sunday, July 30, 2006

Take that panflute industry



Ok, after just making myself out to be a comic snob, I thought this was hilarious. There are other funny comics on www.toothpastefordinner.com but this got me the most.

42

My blogging has been severely lacking as of late. Although my feelings on Spiderman run quite deeply, they really don’t constitute the majority of my feelings about my life, the world and Subarus.

Although I do have to write a quick note about Spiderman, because you brought it up. I was talking to a girl last night who was about to go see Superman at the theater and I felt obligated to let her know that Superman is a moronic superhero and that she was stupid for liking him. I was a bit more tactful. She claimed that Superman was superior because 1. He was more powerful. 2. He was hotter. 3. Spiderman is gross because he excretes bodily fluids on his enemies. 4. Batman is stupid because he can’t fly. I had so many issues with her and her superhero rating system that I had to walk away from her. Again I was more tactful than to immediately turn away from her poorly stated arguments, but I certainly didn’t pursue any further dialogue with her. I realized that there was no way to disprove her ridiculous points without making a complete nerd of myself, as this whole paragraph has served to do. That’s it for superheroes today.

I’m just going to give you the weekend update since I’m too lazy to think back more than a couple days. That and I’m pretty sure nothing happened at all during this work week. Friday I was amazingly social and stayed home and watched Shawn of the Dead. It was actually much better the second time. Why did I buy it if I didn’t think it was that good the first time? For one I compulsively buy movies that are five dollars. For two I supported the concept of the movie regardless of my desire to watch it, so felt it was worth having in my collection. Is that weird? Maybe. I just feel it was a very cool movie. Not too popular, with dry British comedy. And zombies. Anyway, I thoroughly enjoyed watching it again.

Saturday I did a much better job at being a person person. I went to our branch activity, which was ostensibly ice blocking. I had never actually done this (sliding down a hill sitting on a large block of ice) so decided to go through the effort of finding the park. Unfortunately it was pouring at the time and the ice blocks had melted the night before, so no blocking occurred. But we ate some hamburgers and told corny jokes. I was also accosted by the Superman fan, but I’ll try to forget that. After this I stopped by friend’s place (I had given her a ride to the event) and we played Yahtzee and Blackjack for an hour or so until we met up with another friend. I had never played Yahtzee and may never do so again. It was fine, but not something I’d ever do late into the night. I thoroughly trounced her in Blackjack, which is of course my gambling game of choice. After stopping briefly at another friend’s we went to an improv comedy show. It was fairly entertaining at points, but was a far cry from amazing. I’m pretty forgiving of most forms of entertainment, but have a pretty high standard for comedy performance. If I’m going to pay someone for being funny they need to be substantially funnier than any of the amateur performances I’ve put together. Otherwise they’re in the wrong field and are wasting my time. I enjoyed the performance, but more because of the group I was with than the quality of the performance. We dinked around a bit afterwards, mostly so I could procrastinate putting together my lesson for Sunday School.

Today was probably my final Gospel Doctrine lesson. Last time I played with my sword during the lesson and the time before I had played rock music, so I think it was anticlimactic that my final lesson lacked any disruptive elements. But I did have a good time teaching Ba’alism 101 and trying to relate how feeding widows related to causing draught and performing genealogy. I’ve found that church callings very often follow patterns. I ran a Home Evening group, then ran the ward’s FHE program, then once again ran a Home Evening group. The bishop sees what you’ve done and can be pretty confident that you can continue in that or a related calling. I’m hoping that my brief stint as a teacher will start me on a new calling career. I much preferred researching Elijah for the good of the ward to putting together party games and finding people to provide treats. I do value the Home Evening program, and will go as time permits in med school, but this was certainly more fun for me. And isn’t that what church service is all about?

Song of the moment: “White Lines” by Grandmaster Flash.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Venom



The new poster is of Venom not Spiderman. Although it's hard to tell who the actor is in the picture the teeth give it away as being Venom, who looks exactly like Spiderman (in his black costume) on steroids with a toothy grin.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Monday, July 24, 2006

And the winner is . . .

 

After a month of searching, here's the car I chose. It's a 2004 Impreza Outback Sport. I signed my life away for her this afternoon. Now I get to come up with a name for my car as well. Posted by Picasa

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Fizzy Lifting Drink

It’s been some time since I’ve done a product endorsement so I thought I’d do my part in increasing domestic consumerism.  

I am prone to buying new products.  I think this comes from a desire for variety and an adventuring spirit.  Whatever the cause, I will almost always try the new product over the old, even if it is one that I have previously enjoyed.  I am especially enthused by new sodas, so quickly jumped at the opportunity to buy Pepsi Jazz.  My initial impression is that it has a stupid name.

I tried Strawberries and Cream, though they also have a Black Cherry and French Vanilla flavor.  I probably prefer cherry flavoring over strawberry (though prefer actual strawberries) but my pioneering spirit took over.  After all, I’ve had Wild Cherry Pepsi.  How different will Black Cherry Pepsi be?  So strawberries it was.

The verdict?  It’s fine, good even.  But certainly not amazing.  It very much tastes like you mixed a Strawberry flavor soda (Fanta or Sunkist or whoever makes one) and a Diet Pepsi.  If you like both of those flavors, you’ll like it.  There’s a hint of Cream Soda thrown in, which is a plus for me.  So while I enjoyed the bottle and will probably buy it again, it’s by no means revolutionary.  It’s another permutation of the current soda varieties, not a bold new field in soda making.  When will we see the next scientific leap in carbonation?  I eagerly await it.

Song of the moment: “Ageless Beauty" Stars

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

A Chris by any other name

Every move is another chance to redefine yourself.  Not that I often take advantage of this.  But as I prepare to move to Ohio it once again occurred to me that this is my chance to decide upon my name.  So take this opportunity to vote on what I should go by for the next four years.  

The obvious choices are the various adaptations of my given name.  This include, but may not be limited to:

Christopher
Chris
Topher
Christoph
Toph
CJ
James
Jimmy
Sorensen

I’ve attempted a couple of these.  I was CJ for a couple months in elementary school, and was Sorensen for a large portion of middle and high school.  My attempt at Christoph last year had mixed results (a small minority continue to stick by the name, but most stayed with Chris.)

Chances are that I will have to stick with whatever I chose until I leave Ohio.  In Provo it would be possible to switch to a whole new set of associates from year to year, but this won’t work in Columbus.  And in case you care to point it out, I did already introduce myself as Chris to many Ohioans, but I am fairly confident that I could still change it at this point.

Song of the moment: “Take It From Me” The Weepies

Monday, July 17, 2006

Failing Bloggist

Oy, this is why you need to write in your journal every day.  Every day that I don’t post something I become more and more reluctant to look back over the last couple weeks and figure out what I’ve been doing with my life.  Grammar-check informs me that the previous sentence was horrendous in some fashion, but I’m not going to bother to change it.

I guess I’ll just hit the basics.  Work is the same as always.  The longer I’m there the easier it gets, the thus the less notable anything becomes.  I think I’m going to like my clinical rotations in med school.  You’re just there long enough to figure out what’s going on and then you’re off.  I suppose I get some satisfaction by becoming the master of my pharmacy domain, but I’d value variety more than extreme competency.  I suppose patients will prefer their doctor be superbly competent than entertained.

I got my financial aid package from OSU on Saturday.  It’s a very strange thing to receive a letter in the mail telling you that you’ve been given a loan for 39 thousand dollars.  I really can’t wrap my head around that number.  But the fact that I need another 20 thousand dollars to make it through my first year is equally incomprehensible to me.  I’m currently investigating how to appropriate these funds.

I’ve had a pretty good variety of social activities of late.  I’ve been playing volleyball a couple times a week with other members of my branch.  It’s not nearly as beneficial for me as my normal gym routine, but I suppose there’s something to be said for socializing.  I continue to prove myself a better spectator than athlete, but I’m pretty sure that I have yet to be the worst person on the court.  But it’s come close.  Combined with Institute, Home Evening and various church activities such as the Hill Cumorah Pageant and SA dances, I have most of my evenings occupied.  

Of special note is that I recently saw my first comedy performance.  I was invited to go see Sky Sands at a local comedy club.  Although the name sounded familiar, I didn’t know who he was.  Half way through the performance I realized that I had heard him perform on the annual Prairie Home Companion Joke Show.  Sadly he told several of the same jokes that he had a decade ago on that program.  This is highly bothersome to me.  If it’s your job to be funny, can’t you come up with new funny things on a somewhat regular basis?  I’ve done about ten minutes of standup before, with moderate success.  Should I be able to go on the road with this ten minutes of material and provide for myself financially for a decade?  Sky was fairly entertaining, but the flaws in his profession bothered me.  The MC and opening act were rather painful.

Sleep beckons.  

Song of the moment: “9 to 5” by Lady Sovereign.  

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

New Arrivals

I walked in today to discover that I was no longer the new guy at the pharmacy.  The new guy was in fact a girl, so I remain the lone male among the pharmacy technicians.  This fact really has no relevance to anything, except perhaps as a commentary on social trends (all the pharmacists are male, all the technicians are female) and a contributing factor to why patients often think that I’m a pharmacist.  

In any case the newbie is Gwen, and she’s close to my age which is a nice bit of variety to the office.  She’s going to Physician Assistant school in the fall so we’re in roughly the same boat.  She’s only here for two weeks, after which I’ll once again be the new guy.  For now I’ll just be the male guy.

It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything regarding my life, which is quite boring at the moment.  I know I know, it’s usually so thrilling.  I’m pretty decided upon an apartment in Columbus, but need to finalize it.  I’m pretty decided upon a car, but need to finalize it.  It’s a 2004 Dodge Stratus which my church is selling for 7 thousand.  It’s not the car I was originally looking for, but it seems like a good deal.  I drove a Stratus for four months in Idaho and quite liked it.  We’ll see if I commit to spending my life savings on it this week.  

With all the important things I have to be deciding, I spent an hour the other day looking into having a t-shirt made.  I’m quite enamored with having a shirt that says “Kiss me I’m Danish” on it, most likely with a Danish flag on the back.  I designed one online (www.spreadshirt.com) and looked around at several local places to have it made.  But inspiration hit me today to actually google the phrase and I came up with this site that already has my genius shirt http://www.cafepress.com/kissmeim2.42817753 .  Of course this greatly decreases my desire to have one, but I may still order it.

I think my Sunday School class is going well.  It’s pretty hard to judge these things.  You’re always going to have people come, so turnout really isn’t really an indication.  People will always tell you they liked the lesson, no matter how bad it was.  It’s just required after someone gives a lesson or talk that you compliment them on it.  So my only real indication is how many awkward silences I get during the course of the lesson.  I’ve gone from several, to few, to none this week.  This was pretty remarkable considering the fact that I played rock music in the chapel as part of the lesson.  But my goal is to make the Old Testament interesting, and I think music, jokes and candy are combining for that effect, with a bit of doctrine thrown in for good measure.

My social life isn’t the best it’s ever been, but it’s certainly better than it was a month ago.  I’ve been spending quite a bit of time with a girl who shall remain nameless for her own protection.  In case you’re wondering Gwen doesn’t receive that same benefit because I’m quite confident that she will never read this.  Furthermore she’s not nearly as cute.  I’m not sure where things will go with the nonpharmaceutical new girl.  Only time will tell.  It’s unfortunate that there is so little of it left.

Song of the moment: “Break Your Neck” Busta Rhymes

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Arrrgh you looking for movies?

I’m at least a dozen movie reviews behind, but here are some of the movies I’ve seen in theaters as of late.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest

Meh.  This is however a qualified meh.  I wasn’t a fan of the original film.  It was highly overrated and I never really understood why it was so popular.  The plot was knee-deep in holes and it went on forever.  So it wasn’t a huge surprise that I wasn’t thrilled with the sequel, which was much of the same.  As any professional reviewer will tell you, the movie is too long.  Despite the length and the genuinely enjoyable characters, I was never pulled in.  Captain Jack is fun to watch, but I never really cared about the story.  And they did well to focus more on Depp than Bloom, but they overkilled the character.  His prancing and posturing lost its novelty about half way through.  I enjoyed the increased fantasy elements of the story (Davey Jones and his monstrous crew were much more interesting than Barbosa and his zombies) but it did contribute to making the whole thing seem silly and unreal.  If you liked the first, you’ll like the second; the cloning was well-done.  

The Devil Wears Prada

Despite my better judgment, I saw this movie.  It was free and was “bonding” with my family, but it ultimately wasn’t worth my time.  I knew it wasn’t my type of movie beforehand and proved myself correct.  This isn’t to say that the movie didn’t have its enjoyable elements.  I did enjoy watching Meryl Streep verbally assault every other person on screen, and Ann Hathaway certainly is pleasing to look at.  I also enjoy movies and books that give me a view of particular professions.  Who knew the fashion world was like this?  And perhaps it’s not, but it’s something I may never have seen otherwise.  

Thank You For Smoking

This was definitely my winner for the week.  I walked out of the movie immediately wanting to own it.  It was hilarious throughout, thought usually in a subversive and subtle way.  There were certainly many laugh-out-loud moments, but most of the humor was sly and just applied to the whole situation being presented.  It wasn’t a joke-per-second film, but no opportunity for humor was lost.  The personal assistant they meet in LA kept me laughing every second he was on screen.  I had thought the film would be a simple satire of the tobacco industry, but Nick Naylor did such a good job that you found yourself rooting for Big Tobacco.  The movie did feel a bit amateurose, but this style worked well for it.  Aaron Eckhart was fantastic in his part as the lovable cancer-salesman.  The all-star supporting cast each filled their small roles admirably, creating a film that obviously had a lot of support and passion behind it.  The language is rather coarse throughout or I’d recommend this movie nearly universally.  

Song of the moment: “Haunted” The Pogues and Sinead O’Connor

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Further Musings Upon My Future Home

Well, both girls and fireworks distracted me so sorry to keep you in suspense.  Not that I have a particular message this evening, but I know it’s always painful to have those postless days.

So I think I have a place to live for the year.  After spending the vast majority of my time looking for housing immediately adjacent to the school, I think I’ll accept an offer that’s a five minute drive away.  Proximity has always been a very high ideal for me; at BYU I always lived a seven minute walk from my classes.  So I was sorely tempted to pick a place that was similarly close to the hospital.  However the downside of that area is the possibility of being shot on that five minute walk.  The area by the hospital is not the best part of town, which is probably why there are abundant vacancies.  To compound my indecisiveness, this area also had the best rents.  I could be living in a house for 255 a month!  I’d even be living with other med and graduate students.  However they wouldn’t be Mormon.  In fact the particular house I was looking at was a med student, his girlfriend, and her friend, plus the lucky fourth roomy.  I don’t think I really want to live with a couple.  

So this makes me think I’ll live at the Campus Colony.  A five minute drive to the parking area, plus five minutes to class is a pretty reasonable commute.  The Colony is in a nicer part of town, just across the river.  The rent is higher, about 360.  But I’d only have one roommate, and I already have a guy from Utah that wants me to live with him.  I think it would be pretty convenient to live with an LDS med student who is also starting his first year.  Unless he’s no good to mooch off of, in which case he won’t do me much good.  The place is described as Little Provo, which isn’t exactly what I’m looking for.  But I certainly think it would be convenient to have a dozen or so church members in the complex.  It could be a good transition phase from being surrounded by them for the last three years and being in the real world for the rest of my life.  

I quite liked Columbus.  It seems clean and easy to get around in.  It manages to both have the college-town feel of cities such as Provo, while also having the size and variety of a full-blown city like Rochester.  The frat houses will take some getting used to, but I suspect I won’t even notice the beer bottles soon.  I think I do prefer the University of Rochester slightly over Ohio State, but I like Columbus more than Rochester.  I can definitely see myself living there, whereas I had trouble imagining living at home for four years.  Even living in the same city would’ve been a bit strange.  But I think Columbus will do the trick, especially if I get myself to care about Buckeyes.  

Song of the moment: “Orange Crush” Snapdragon

Monday, July 03, 2006

Colum bus ride

It hasn’t quite hit me that I’ll be an Ohian next month, or an Ohioan even.  But in preparation of this metamorphosis of my very character I made a trip down there this weekend.  I had planned on leaving Saturday morning, but only in a very general way.  In fact a major characteristic of this trip was that there was little-to-no planning involved.  I threw a bunch of stuff in the car and drove a couple states away.  I didn’t know exactly what I’d be doing or when I’d be back.  Que sera sera and all that.  My goal: find a place to live for the next year.  My plan: drive around Columbus.  I’m sure many would be surprised that for the most part this plan worked.

The drive to Columbus is actually 6.5 hours.  I read this on mapquest (my two mapquest maps were my only directions, which made me feel quite manly) and thought that it really meant the trip would be 5 hours.  I have my patented speeding formulas and I’d surely be able to make record time.  Sadly construction and fear of vicious Ohioan cops kept me from making it any faster than 6.35 hours.  It’s not a bad drive from Rochester, though relatively boring.

I had said that I planned on leaving in the morning.  I actually left at 3 in the afternoon.  It is difficult to keep yourself to a schedule when it is completely artificial.  However I did spend the morning finding perspective places to live.  These consisted of places where Ohio State students typically live through their website, as well as finding med students who wanted roommates.  I had discovered earlier that there was a board at the local Institute building where they kept postings of Mormons in need of roommates, so I figured I had quite the pool to draw from.  Various delays kept me around until 3 but then I was off.  I arrived in Columbus at 10, a bit stiff but otherwise in good spirits.  Daylight had abandoned me but I still took the time to find the Med school, the Institute and my top contender for housing, the Colony Club.  

At 11 I decided I was done for the day and decided I should find a place to sleep.  Earlier in the day I had made arrangements to stay at the Robinsons (friends of mine from NY who met at the Hill Cumorah Pageant, got married and moved to Columbus) but decided I didn’t want to sleep there.  They’re great and all but they had other guests over and it just wasn’t worth the hassle.  So I decided to discover how the other half lives.  By the other half I mean homeless people who happen to own Honda CRVs with leather seats.  I really had no good reason to sleep in the car, other than I had never done so before.  I always considered in an option for roadtrips, but had never tried it.  Since the weekend already had a exploring/camping vibe to it, I figured it was the perfect opportunity.  It would have been a great bonding experience if I had done it with my new car, but sadly I have not yet chosen one.  So the CRV it was.

In case you ever need to sleep in a squat SUV, there are at least five different sleeping positions available to you.  I eventually chose one where I slept in the back seat, reclined as far as it would go, with my feet on the head of the reclined passenger seat.  I’m quite confident that it would have been a good night’s sleep, if not for the 90 degree temperature outside.  I also worried a bit that a policeman would come along and give me a loitering charge.  But I think I chose a good neighborhood to sleep in and effectively hid below the window-line.  I’ve had better nights of sleep, but also much worse.  I think I scared an old man rather seriously when I sat up in the morning as he was walking past the car, but otherwise it went well.

I ate a breakfast of Twix and stale bagel and headed towards the church.  I had time to look at a couple perspective apartments before getting there and changing into my Sunday clothes.  I’m sure I’ve smelled better for church before, but my hair was disheveled quite well.  I attended the 1st ward, taking time to write down addresses and phone numbers off the bulletin board between blocks.  I also announced who I was and got several people who were interested in having me as a roommate.  Having sucked the ward dry of their resources I hit a bunch of apartments before the 2nd ward started their meetings.  I again got a number of leads, then enjoyed the joint ward break the fast activity.  At this event I not only got free food, but had a girl refer to me as “the hot one.”  This of course endeared me to her ward, which was the 2nd.  

Although there are two singles wards in Columbus, there seemed to be quite a discrepancy in their sizes.  The first ward was probably about fifty strong (still larger than the Rochester branch, but not by much) whereas the second ward must have broken 120.  This of course predisposed me to investigate the 2nd ward in greater detail.  Unfortunately all the places I had looked at thus far, and most that I looked at later were in the 1st ward.  Of course a good person would probably say “Hey, the 1st ward obviously needs more membership, that’s where I should live.”  My thoughts were more like “The 2nd ward has at least twice as many girls, and I should be their neighbor.”  I think the natural man may win this battle.

I continued looking for housing until 8 that night.  Having exhausted my resources at hand I called it a trip and drove back to Rochester.  I considered sleeping in the car and taking off in the morning, but I’m actually much more alert at 2 at night than 8 in the morning, so driving at night was actually safer.  And easier on my back.  And considering that I’d been in that car for the vast majority of the last 36 hours, it was time to get out.

I’ll give you my impressions of Columbus tomorrow, assuming that pretty fireworks or girls don’t distract me too terribly.

Song of the moment: “Hoodie” by Lady Sovereign.