Saturday, December 27, 2008

The Movies of 2008

As I was stepping out the door to drive to NY a couple days back my roommate says “Hey Chris, what was the best of movie of the year.” This was problematic because I hadn’t ranked all the movies from this year. Admittedly, that’s the kind of thing I would do, but it was still odd that he assumed I’d already done it and could give him the result. To further complicate things, this roommate and I have nearly opposite taste in movies, so my suggestion wouldn’t have been very helpful. In any case, I just looked up all the movies that came out this year and have ranked them below.

1. Forgetting Sarah Marshall – Pretty sure the Academy is going to disagree with me on this one. But I loved the comedy, the characters, the story, and most everything about the movie and no other movie can claim that this year.
2. The Dark Knight – I don’t really have anything to add about this one. Most everyone agrees that it turned out better than anyone thought.
3. Role Models – Even though seeing it 2 days in a row was a mistake, it was still hilarious. It was also cheesy, but intentionally so. If it had Kristen Bell in it, it might’ve been #1.
4. The Fall – The only problem with The Fall is that it was uneven. The 2 halves of the movie didn’t mesh very well. But both halves were good independently.
5. Iron Man – Batman was the better movie, but this was more fun.
6. Hellboy 2 – Batman was better, Iron Man was more fun, but Hellboy was interesting and beautiful. I wish it had been better and more fun, but I’m pretty sure Hellboy 3 will be amazing.
7. Be Kind Rewind – Dunno, I liked it. It was amateurish at times, but I liked the concept and feeling of the movie so much it overcame it.
8. Let the Right One In – THE vampire romance to see this year.
9. Cloverfield – People dumped on this movie, but I thought it did everything right. I was engrossed. Few movies are actually engrossing.
10. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button – It was good, but not engrossing. I was amazed by the visuals and touched by the story, but not remarkably so. Good but not great.
11. Get Smart - I fully expected this movie to be terrible. And then it wasn’t and I was happy. It’s fluff, but it’s funny and for the most part family appropriate.
12. In Bruges – Not family appropriate. But both funny and hefty. But also somewhat plodding, so it didn’t score higher.
13. Pineapple Express – This one was funny, but not hefty, and still fairly plodding. You’re talented comedians, but hire an editor already.
14. Incredible Hulk – I’m biased because I think The Hulk is awesome, but this was a darn good flick. It served up exactly what it promised.
15. Quantum of Solace – This one was a bit of a letdown. It was still quite entertaining, with guns, fighting, girls (2 of them!) etc etc. But I had higher expectations.
16. Wanted – I had low expectations, and it easily overshot them. A thoroughly ridiculous movie (Shoot Em Up is the only thing I can think of that was more ridiculous) but when they do it intentionally you can’t really fault them for it.
17. Speed Racer – You can’t listen to critics (me included.) This movie was fun. It was clearly aimed squarely at 8-12 year olds, but it was still a good time.
18. Burn After Reading – Meh. I laughed a couple times and was impressed by twists a couple times. But all in all, meh. It may get better with a repeat viewing.
19. The Bank Job – Jason Statham is, amongst other things, the man. This movie is a little unnecessarily complicated (due to the retelling of actual events) but still a good heist.
20. Body of Lies – This movie was very well done, I just didn’t know what the point of it was.
21. Man on Wire – I don’t get French people. I just don’t.
22. Baby Mama – I wanted this movie to be better. It was fine, just very formulaic.
23. X-Files: I Want to Believe – I’m a big enough fan of the X-Files that I enjoyed it, but most people don’t need to see it.
24. Death Race – See number 19. Jason Statham is the man. I really liked this movie but couldn’t put it any higher because I fully realize that it’s terrible. But also sweet.
25. The Ruins – Well worth the dollar fifty I paid. I’m sure this will come as a huge shock, but the book was better.
26. The Foot Fist Way – I laughed very hard a couple times. I was bored for the rest.
27. Tropic Thunder – I hate Ben Stiller. That limited this movie’s ability to score higher.
28. Doomsday – To be fair, I’ve only watched the first 1/3 of this movie. But seeing as I haven’t gotten around to watching the last 2/3, that tells you something.
29. Semi-Pro – I’m ready and willing to laugh at dumb humor, but this just didn’t do it for me.

I was pretty surprised that I’ve seen this many movies this year. But to give you a little context, I’ve included below the movies that I wanted to see, but didn’t get to. Stupid medical school.

RocknRolla
Slumdog Millionaire
Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Repo! The Genetic Opera!
Synecdoche, New York
Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist
Hamlet 2
The Strangers
Ghost Town
The Changeling
Frost/Nixon
Rachel Getting Married
Teeth
Funny Games
Smart People
How to Lose Friends and Alienate People
Choke
Fanboys - I hate Star Wars, I just need to see the Kristen Bell scenes.
The Signal
The Promotion
Appaloosa
Blindness
The Wrestler
The Mongol
Defiance

If you want see any of those, we’ve proven that I spend 2.4 nights a month watching fairly current movies. Chances are pretty good we can work something out.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Things you Didn't Know About Christmas

(Unless you attended my Sunday School Lesson)

Santa Claus is real, despite what your friends whispered to you in kindergarten. As real as Davy Crockett anyway. Saint Nicholas was Turkish and died in 340 AD. He was a Christian and was tortured by the Romans until Emperor Constantine (famous for being the first Christian emperor, or at least famous to those of us that took 4 years of Latin in high school) set him free.

As with patron saints, he’s pretty willing to patronize things. He’s the patron saint of children and travelers, which makes sense. Maybe also the patron saint of hypercholesterolemia. He’s the patron saint of both Russia and Italy. In Greece he’s the saint of sailors. In France he’s the saint of lawyers.

Saint Nicholas was popular among the Dutch, who thought he put toys and candy in their kids wooden shoes. Saint Nicholas is Sint Nikolaas in Dutch. Sint Nikolass eventually got contracted to Sinterklass. Sinterklass got anglicized to Santa Claus. So Sarah Silverman is wrong, he’s Dutch/Turkish, not German (Give the Jew Girl Toys It’s Sarah Silverman, so it’s going to be offensive.)

Switching subjects, What’s the Deal with Mistletoe? (Incidentally, when I say What’s the Deal, I always say it in an annoying Seinfeld impersonation.)

Druids were the first ones to dig on Mistletoe. Since it’s an evergreen they thought it had special qualities. There are lots of evergreens, so I’m not sure how they picked it out, but who can explain druidism. The Celts believed mistletoe had special healing properties. The Romans felt it was connected to peace and any 2 Romans who met under mistletoe had to hug it out instead of fight. Our current romantic connotation with mistletoe comes from the Scandinavians. Mistletoe is the favorite foliage of Frigga, the goddess of fertility and love.

The Catholic church didn’t like mistletoe. They thought it was pagan and sensual (which is probably exactly why people like it.) So they decided that mistletoe shouldn’t be used around Christmas, and we should use holly instead. Holly leaves are meant to represent the crown of thorns that Christ wore, and the red berries represent his blood. Not really as fun as mistletoe.

Changing subject to another plant, Christmas trees. Christmas trees have been used since pagan times (ie before Christmas.) Again, evergreens were thought to have special qualities, so were used for the festivities around the winter solstice. These got wrapped in with Christmas in the middle ages. Christmas trees were decorated, frequently to represent the Tree of Life (the one in the Garden of Eden, not the MTC.) Pageants would often include a scene with Adam and Eve and their tree, looking forward to the coming of the Christ.

Who invented Christmas lights? That’s right, Martin Luther! None of you guessed Martin Luther, I’m sure. As the story goes, he was walking home one Christmas season and saw the starlight shining through the boughs of the Christmas trees. He liked it so well that he hooked a bunch of candles to his tree. And lighting the Christmas tree was born.

One last one: candycanes. Invented in Germany (Cologne to be exact) to keep kids quiet during church. Before there were cheerios, there were candycanes. Except they were just white sugar sticks, not the current version. But that’s how they got started. It’s a little unclear who did what, but perhaps there, perhaps somewhere else they decided to bend the sticks so they looked like a shepherd’s crook, since Christ was the shepherd of men. The sticks are white to represent the purity of Christ. Traditional candycanes have 3 red stripes: 3 for the Trinity and red for the blood of Christ. The first sighting of candycanes in America occurred in none other than Wooster Ohio. I thought of them as I passed the Wooster exit on the way to NY yesterday.

That’s it for today. I’ll try to dig up some dirt on St. Patrick or St. Valentine in a couple months.

Merry Christmas
Happy Hanukah
Happy Kwanzaa
And Festivus for the rest of us.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Ho Lee Cow

I can't decide if this is awesome or sad, but I'm leaning towards awesome.

Thundercats

I thought I was good at wasting time.

Monday, December 22, 2008

ChrisMix 08



Below are my 22 favorite new songs of 2008. Why 22? It’s lucky. And it’s how many happen to fit on a CD. Plus my annual Christmas song, and a bonus track. And some hidden PC content. The first track is the Christmas track, the last the bonus track, and we countdown from #22 to #1 in between.

1. The Christians and the Pagans - Dar Williams.
I didn’t discover this song this year, but I found my own copy of it. I’d heard it years ago on the radio (WBER in Rochester, my favorite radio station) and decided to track it down. I called up the radio station and asked them, “Hey, what’s that lesbian Christmas song you played 8 years ago?” I would’ve been truly impressed if the DJ on hand could have told me, but they couldn’t. But they did email me their catalogue of Christmas music. Once I saw Dar’s name, I knew I had my song.

2. Standing in the Way of the Connection - A plus D
My favorite mashup of the year. Take my favorite song intro from 1994 (really one of my favorite song intros ever) and a quality number from 2006 and you’ve got a great combo. This song has made it into most of the mixes I’ve made for my daily life this year.

3. Right as Rain – Adele
I’ve got to be honest, Adele wasn’t going to make my top 22 until I realized how American my list was. After last year’s staggering British presence, I felt it unbalanced to wipe them off the list completely. Plus, I really like this song. Maybe all these British soul chanteuses are starting to sound alike, but they’re still catchy.

4. Ten Things - Paul Baribeau
I went to a number of local shows this year, and only one of the artists is available on iTunes. Probably not the best reason for him to make it on to the list, but I do really like this song. I’m not really into Lo-Fi (though my number one song is from a famous Lo-Fi artist) but I think the live sound of this track really enhances it. He was a lot of fun to see, even if we were in a gross basement. Maybe because we were in a gross basement.

5. Fruit Machine - Ting Tings
I really like the Ting Tings, but I can see where others won’t. They’re not musical masterminds, they’re not particularly good singers, and I think the beat might even be a little too funky for dancing. But I know what I like when I hear it. Check out Great DJ and Shut Up and Let Me Go to see if you agree.

6. A Drop Filled With Memories - Hirasawa Susumu
I decided only to let one instrumental number into my top 22. Sorry Ratatat. Instrumental numbers are hard to pull off. You don’t want them too simple or they’re not interesting. You don’t want them too complex or it just becomes noise. This is just right. I’ve used this song and the rest of the Paprika soundtrack as relaxation music all year. Go see Paprika, anime won’t kill you.

7. California Girls - The Magnetic Fields
Those Beach Boys weren’t right about much. Kokomo? Not an island. And California Girls? Most of them suck. If you’re a California girl, prove me wrong. The Magnetic Fields and I agree on the subject. And they’ve got some awesome distortion to back up our view.

8. Black Hole - She & Him
If I were a celebrity, I’d totally form a rock band. And my own clothing line, brand of soda (which would probably taste just like Dr. Pepper, because how could I improve it?) and tons of other stuff. Not to make extra money, but because I’d be famous and would get to produce whatever entertained me at the time. Zooey Deschanel didn’t go for the rock band, but instead for an alt folk one. And I applaud her. When everyone else is going to the 80s for retro, she goes for the 50s and 60s. Kudos for doing whatever you feel like, and having it work out.

9. Windows - N.E.R.D.
According to a source that I don’t particularly trust, the Neptunes worked on 43% of the songs played on US radio in 2003, which sounds ridiculously high. That’s like saying they worked on every song featuring a guitar. In any case, they decide to call themselves N.E.R.D. some of the time, and produce some pretty slick beats. This one is great, as is My Drive Thru.

10. The Immediacy of Now - Paul Fidalgo and the Conflict of Interest
I love me a vocal distorter. So true story: I have no idea how I found this song. I know I bought it through iTunes, but can’t for the life of me remember how I came across the artist in the first place. Evidently Paul has some kind of subliminal advertising in my textbooks.

11. Any Other World – Mika
So I probably shouldn’t have included this song on the list. It’s great and all, but half the point of the list is helping people find obscure artists they wouldn’t normally come across, and everyone knows that Grace Kelly song. Plus I had downloaded the album a year or two ago, and just never got around to listening to it, so it’s not new either. But it turns out the whole album is great. So skip Grace Kelly (or listen to it, if you somehow missed it) and that grating Lollipop song, and enjoy the rest of a great album.

12. Step by Step - Jesse Winchester
I played this for a friend and she said it was country. It’s definitely not country. I wouldn’t have a country song on this list. It’s bluesy folk indie rock. Ok, I don’t know what it is, but it’s not country.

13. I'm a Lady – Santogold
Misheard lyrics: “And I like sometimes to whip it out, so everyone can see I’m a lady.” Incorrect, but funny lyrics for someone else to write a song around. Santogold is a little bit of a cheat since she appeared on a track on last year’s ChrisMix, as a guest vocalist for Mark Ronson. Very tricky Santogold; way to work the system so you get to be on my yearly mix twice.

14. Acknowledge Me - Elias and the Wizzkids
We’re now in the top 10 songs of the year! Exciting, I know. I had a hard time picking this one, since I like most every song on this album. So if you’re last minute Christmas shopping, get someone this album. It’s a good one.

15. The Baltic Sea - The Social Services
As a Dane, I’m always on the lookout for songs criticizing Sweden and Norway. It’s your fault that people spell my name wrong you stupid Swedes. Surprisingly, these songs are fairly difficult to come across. So when I found this one, I knew it would be in my top ten. Plus they sing about Ikea and wind power and all kinds of topics that are underrepresented in the music industry.

16. The Old Prince Lives at Home – Shad
As a doctor, I’m always on the lookout for songs criticizing dentists. Surprisingly these songs are fairly difficult to come across. This song is good, until you reach two minutes in, when it becomes awesome. Holla.

17. Visit From The Dead Dog - Ed Harcourt
This may very well be my album of the year. Every track is very distinct, and very great. If being very great is possible. It’s also the first artist I learned about through a commercial. Advertising does work once in a great while.

18. Bad Things - Jace Everett
I’m in denial. There’s a country song on this list. How could such a thing happen? I could claim that it’s bluegrass, but the sad truth is that it’s country. It’s the theme song of True Blood and it got intractably stuck in my head. Screw you HBO for making me do this.

19. Hedonistic Me - Born Ruffians
This is another album I had a hard time picking apart. This song may have won out simply because it had a sweet name. If you’ve actually been listening to these songs as you read the list you’ll probably notice that it’s been a pretty indie year. There’s been some rock, hip-hop and (blag) country thrown in, but indie has definitely made its presence known.

20. Bohemian Like You - The Dandy Warhols
I almost gave this spot to another Dandy Warhol’s track, We Used to Be Friends. But I thought it fairly ridiculous to have 3 tv theme songs on the list. True Blood uses Jace, Skins uses The Gossip (a song used in the mashup from track 2) and Veronica Mars uses the Dandy Warhols. But this song is equally excellent, and not a theme song.

21. No Sex For Ben - The Rapture
Instead of taking this song from a tv show, I took it from a video game. I don’t actually have the time or money to play Grand Theft Auto, but it does have a pretty good soundtrack. Although I try to avoid overtly sexual songs from this yearly mix, I felt ok about this one. Sure they say SEX about 800 times, but each time they’re saying NO SEX. It’s really about abstinence.

22. The World Should Revolve Around Me - Little Jackie
I’m not going to lie, this song is better with swearing. But for you I got the edited version. It takes away some of the sassiness. I’ve got talent and I’ve got wits just doesn’t have the sociological contrast or alliteration of the original lyric. Oh well. This album is great, though Imani doesn’t really show her range from song to song. If you want to hear some crazy stuff, get her Black and White Album. Much crazier, but this Little Jackie album is better despite its homogeneity.

23. Love Love Love - The Mountain Goats
This is it, the top song of the year. Most people’s response is: really? Really. After listening to Heretic Pride (which is not the album this song is from, but his most recent album and is amazing) I got pretty hooked. People in-the-know have been listening to the Goats since the early 90s. They tend to be artsy, elitist folk, with vinyl collections. I’ve actually never met one, but that’s what I’d assume. Anyway, the Goats have been doing Lo-fi stuff up until recently, and honestly, Lo-fi often drives me crazy. But in any case I’ve been listening to a lot of their more produced albums, and enjoying them greatly. And I’m sure each and every one of those artsy elitist folk would give you a different Mountain Goats song as their personal favorite (they’re very prolific, I already have 390 of their songs.) This is mine.

24. I’m Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How To Dance with You -Kate Nash
This is a secret track because it’s not eligible for this year’s mix. Sorry Kate, you can’t get back on the ChrisMix unless you change your name. I like The Black Kids version, but I like this one much better. I’m not really sure why the Black Kids, the lead singer of which appears to be a Native American male, sing about being a little girl, but it makes more sense when Kate sings it. And it sounds better. And she should email me if she reads my blog.

That’s it for this year. If you’re getting your ChrisMix through iTunes, you can go here:

ChrisMix 08

You don’t get the nifty CD case I designed, but you do have the option of downloading 3 additional songs to round out the top 25 tracks of the year:
23. The Re-Arranger – Mates of State
24. Cheap and Cheerful - The Kills
25. Esmerelda – Speech

Have a Merry ChrisMix.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

DeDating

Stormcloud and I were supposed to go out the other night. I wanted to go get my lobster before the holidays kicked in. You know, when everyone else gets their lobster. So she kindly obliged and I headed over to her house.

The trek to her place was hazardous, fraught with icy roads, adult bookstores (turns out there are 2 between our homes) and people who don't know how to drive on icy roads or past adult bookstores. A minute from her house I get a call. "Hey . . . so . . . some of my family just stopped by and want to go to dinner. Do you want to come with us?"

Ladies, FYI, it's really annoying when you invite people along on a date. It doesn't matter what the circumstances, it's annoying. It dedatifies the evening. We'd paired off, I'd planned something and unless the lobster ended up being free, was going to pay for it. Maybe lobster is free, I don't know, since I didn't get any. Point being, I'd done everything within my power to make it a date, and she dedated it.

Did she do it intentionally? Probably not. Though, doing it intentionally sure is a way to send a hint. Problem being, when you do it unintentionally, the guy may still take it as a hint. Were there extenuating circumstances? Kind of. Certainly, this was her last chance to do something with family members, which generally trump friends/prospects, and that makes it less egregious. Did it ruin the evening? No, her family ended up being pretty enjoyable. It was definitely the first time I heard a married woman make a scrotum joke. And I appreciated that opportunity. But the fact remains, she dedated me. And I didn't get my lobster.

Ladies, be cognizant of your dedating. Use it as a way out of an awkward situation if you must, but please be aware what you're doing. Saying no to a guy is less annoying that hijacking the date away from him. Inviting your friends, even mutual friends, may seem fine to you, but be aware that you're dedating. Unless you've gone out, I'll arbitrarily pick 5 times, you can't invite people without it being an affront. And it matters who you invite. Family can be intimidating (Oh no, I'm prematurely meeting the family!) but are less offensive. Girls can be annoying (because girls can be annoying) but can be invited sooner. Guys are just out of the picture until things are pretty firmly established. It doesn't matter how long you've been friends or how shortly he'll be in town or how much he's into other guys, you're still dedating by bringing him.

Dedating. Use it with caution.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like ChrisMix

Evidently my linkage wasn't clear in past posts. In recent history I've posted the following:

ChrisMix 2005
ChrisMix Oh Six
ChrisMix 007
ChrisMix 2008: Disqualified

I think a major problem is my color scheme, which may make links less obvious. I may overhaul the site's look in the near future. Thoughts? I've heard that light lettering on a dark background strains the eyes, but I've also heard that about dark lettering on a white background. You just can't win.

Today I'm posting a new mix:

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like ChrisMix 2008 .

Unlike previous years, this year I ranked my top 50 songs. This list contains songs 26-50. 1-25 will get posted next week. I know, try to contain yourself. Follow that link above if you'd like to give Apple some money. And maybe the artist will get some too. I'll ask Paul Baribeau about it.

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like ChrisMix 2008

26. Bad Before Good - Day One
27. The Ark - Dr. Dog
28. How We Do - Mount Sims
29. I'm Always Manic (When I'm Around You) - A Big Yes and a small no
30. Dura - Ratatat
31. Dreadlock Holiday - 10cc
32. Thin Captain Crackers - Augie March
33. Brand New Day - Neil Patrick Harris
34. Bring Me Down - Lenka
35. New Soul - Yael Naïm
36. Academia - Sia
37. Dark Road - Richard Hawley
38. Title Music (From Merchant Ivory's Film "Bombay Talkie") - Shankar Jaikishan
39. Aht Uh Mi Hed - Shuggie Otis
40. 99 Luft Balloons - Saintseneca
41 . The Crook of My Good Arm - Pale Young Gentlemen
42. Carpetbaggers - Jenny Lewis
43. Ocean of Lust - DeVotchKa
44. CERN - Alpine Kat
45. Calling and Not Calling My Ex - Okkervil River
46. The General Specific - Band of Horses
47. Paradise - Ana Laan
48. Miss Myrtle - Albert Hammond Jr.
49. Walking On Air - Kerli
50. The Opposite of Hallelujah - Jens Lekman

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Stop being productive

I was going to post a hilarious commentary on why I don't like salt, titled What's the Deal with Salt?, but decided to spare you. Instead I'll provide you with a couple links to waste your valuable time.

I was reminded of this clip as I was studying this morning and my phone said "Second tip: Go to bed early, you doofus!" I realize that most people don't have jokes as their text-message alerts, but hey, I'm not most people. I highly suggest watching it several times in a row, because it gets funnier.

Brule's Rules: Living

Increasing on the offensive scale: The Retarded Policeman. They claim (the actor and his brother the writer) that it's not offensive or exploitive because the actor (who has Down's) knows what he's doing and likes entertaining. Maybe it's not exploitive, but it's definitely offensive. And awkwardly funny.

Goodbye Officer Monkey

Moving further up on the offensive scale: Children's Hospital. Wrong in pretty much every way imaginable. That's talent. They particularly target Grey's Anatomy, but no one is safe from their wrath. Did I mention this was offensive? Don't blame me when you don't like it.

I just lost 50 minutes of my life.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Living in the Project

The Sexy Chris Project: Phase 1 is half over. I'd expect that most people that are going to contribute have contributed (evidently some girls were very eager to tell me how to change very quickly) but I'm collecting responses for the next couple weeks. Then over Christmas break I'll compile my data into some kind of a report. I'm sure some meta-analysis and fancy binding will be involved.

The results have been very interesting. Unfortunately I love playing detective and am pretty good at recognizing writing styles, so anonymity has been compromised to some extent. But I'm trying to be good and consider the advice without deciphering the writer.

Some responses have been very specific, others very general. Some are very much catered to my deficits, others seem to be blanket statements for men in general. Some writers end up talking about themselves for a good portion of the email. Focus people! This is about me. One writer challenged me to post theirs, and I found it especially entertaining, so I'll oblige.

You are very insecure and have attachment issues. Possibly from childhood most things are. You are extremely vulnerable and emotional therefore you do your level best to hide this from the world and paint yourself as an unsmiling jerk. You are afraid to get close to people and you set unrealistic expectations on the people you want to date because they don't want to date you - so you are engaging in a bit of self sabotage on purpose.

You try if you can help it not to indulge your emotions in any meaningful way however you pick up on everyone and everything and you know what people may be thinking about you because you consciously choose to have them think that way by your words and your deeds.

You don't like men and you don't like to be challenged by men because you're afraid you'll fail. You and your father's relationship was a disaster and you had zero modeling from him. Therefore the job was left up to your mom who you didn't entirely trust could meet your needs either.

So what did you do? You went it alone. You still feel alone. You still feel like no one does or ever will understand you. There is a good reason for that. Because you will not let people in on that level. You've never divulged most of this to anyone so they are educated guesses. But I know I'm right.

Share this on your blog if you dare. I doubt you will however.

Well, we've got proof that you were wrong about one thing at least: I did post it on my blog. Looks like you don't know me very well.

Others have been, shall we say, softer.

first of all, no probs who you share this with. Second of all-- I've called ALL my best-every guy friends before and had them hit me with it.... (and tell me why I wasn't sexy) so I know EXACTLY how you feel. My only advice is be happy. Simply put, be happy just how you are- single, and totally the most fun guy ever.. Oh, and what made me fall in love w/ my husband was the fact that he played NO (that means ZERO) games. He was terrified to ask me out but he did anyway. He was TERRIFIED to kiss me but he did anyway... the hard way... on a doorstep, when it was still kind of light outside! But it was all very real and very sincere. Not afraid to be a dork... and totally HAPPY in his own skin. :0) You do have a bit of the tortured poet in you-- (which you should never change!) but maybe make it the "tortured poet who is totally comfortable just how he is and know's he's a catch... and that any girl who won't go out with him is destined to a tortured life without a tortured poet. :0)

You're radness... .so never think anything's wrong with you. The Hus and I both agree that providence was ABSOLUTELY involved in getting us together-- and it was just the right time for both of us.. so take a deep breath, and relax, and just keep believing in love and mush-- and know it will hit you when it hits you. Otherwise go about your life and enjoy every moment! :0) And dare yourself to hit on girls, and double dog dare yoruself to say things you would never normally say. :0) And terrify yourself by trying to kiss girls you would never try to kiss... and laugh about it when it goes wrong. :0) like "oops. I guess I won't do that again."

So here's to the misery of being single, where you lose your stomache over and over again on the crazy rides.... and to the misery of being married where it's just a long, twilight walk down a dirt path that never ends. :0) The trick is to try and love them both. :0)

*muah*


I mostly posted that one because I like being called a tortured poet. Though, as some advice for you single guys out there: I've found that poems aren't very effective honey. Maybe mine just weren't any good. The last one I wrote was about pyruvate.

I know who both writers are, and consider one of them a friend who knows me well. I'll leave you to guess which is which.

Anyway, if you're going to submit to The Project, try to get it in before Christmas. I'll still read it afterwards, but you won't get your own footnote in the report.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Not really a substantial post

I'm blogging from work! Probably not very professional. But when they make me work 30 hour days, I don't feel too bad.

The sad news is that for as much as I've talked about music lately, probably 50% of the rest of the month's posts will be about ChrisMix 08. Sorry, but I'm going to be crazy busy so posting links to iTunes mixes is about all you're getting for a little while.

Today you get 30ish songs that were disqualified from ChrisMix this year. The following offenses can get you disqualified:
1. Being played on the radio.
2. Having explicit lyrics.
3. Being from a band I've listened to before 2008, even if the song is new.
4. Being my 2nd favorite song by a new band (the 1st getting into the ChrisMix proper.)

So these songs all had one of these factors working against them. But they're still a great bunch of songs.

ChrisMix 08: Disqualified

Both Hands (2007 version) Ani DiFranco

All I Want Is YouBarry Louis Polisar

You Don't Know Me (feat. Regina Spektor) Ben Folds

F*****g Boyfriend The Bird and the Bee

Music Is My Hot, Hot Sex CSS

We Used to Be Friends The Dandy Warhols

Valerie Plame The Decemberists

From Dr. Dog

Mercy (feat. The Game) [Remix] Duffy

The Pristine Claw Ed Harcourt

I Wish Elias & The Wizzkids

Jungle Drum Emiliana Torrini

Inside of You Infant Sorrow

Number One John Legend

Liked You Better Before Little Jackie

Paper Planes M.I.A.

Drive On, Driver The Magnetic Fields

Time to Pretend MGMT

My Interpretation MIKA

Autoclave The Mountain Goats

Young Folks Peter Bjorn and John

Falcon Jab Ratatat

Lights Out Santogold

Why Do You Let Me Stay Here? She & Him

Drama Queen Switches

Shut Up and Let Me Go The Ting Tings

Oxford Comma Vampire Weekend

Nobody Knows Me At All The Weepies

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Just so you know I'm not dead

I feel like I should post something, but don't have anything to post.

The problem with working in a hospital all day is that I'm legally restricted from telling you parts of my day, I'm professionally restricted from telling you others and the remainder is too boring for you to want to read. Leaving music and dating theory as the lone topics of the blog.

Speaking of which, Kate Nash is kind of adorable. Here's some proof.

I hear she's horrible in concert, which kind of makes me like her more. I was at a dance on Friday and I found myself strangely attracted to a couple girls who couldn't dance. Evidently I don't value performance.

Congrats to me, back to music and dating.

For some variety, here's a quick movie review:

Role Models - hilarious. So hilarious, I watched it two nights in a row, which was a mistake. Turns out no movie is funny enough to watch two nights in a row.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Where are they now?

I’ve put up ChrisMix-Oh-Six and ChrisMix 007 on iTunes. Go get some good music, if you’re into that whole downloading thing.

It was interesting to look at some of these songs now. A few quick observations.

Bands I don’t listen to much anymore
1. KT Tunstall. She had her 15 minutes of fame shortly after I discovered her, which always ruins it for me.
2. Lady Sovereign. I moved on to Lily Allen, then onto Kate Nash for my cockney fix. Listening again she’s still fun, just not terribly interesting musically.
3. The Blow. It’s tricky making a mix for a whole year. I really liked this song for a couple weeks, which happened to be the couple weeks I was making the mix. It’s certainly not a bad song, just not one that frequently gets added to my normal mixes.
4. Eskimo Joe – Another song I loved last December, so it made it. Though listening to the whole album, it is pretty good.

Generally though, the songs have held up very well. Chances are pretty good that any given mix I’m listening to has a song or two from these lists. And I’ve continued to follow lots of the bands. For instance:

The Weepies are still great. I wanted to add Nobody Knows Me At All to this year’s mix, but the rules of ChrisMix prevent it.

I really like a track of Kate Nash covering The Black Kids’ I’m Not Going to Teach Your Boyfriend to Dance with You. It’s funny that I got both the original song and this cover within a day of each other. Again, in my top songs of the year, but a rehash from last year's artist.

ChrisMix 08 is nearly done. Put in an order if you’d like one.