I lied. It's what I do.

Ok, study break.

So last night, on another study break, and as part of The Sexy Chris Project, I went Speed Dating. Primarily to get myself some funny 3 minute chunks of awkwardness. And wouldn’t you know it, I left empty handed.

That’s right, no awkwardness. No funny stories. No “this lawyer girl was SO crazy.” Only nice girls. Nice girls that may potentially be interested in me. What a waste of an evening.

So I left without any crazy stories, but here are some observations:

There were a gajillion med students there. Not among the girls; it seems that we have no single girls in my class. Turns out that whole “guys are intimidated by intelligent professional women” thing is a myth, which I could’ve told you. That being said, I did talk to 3 girls from the med school, who were all nice, cute etc and I’d be perfectly happy if they wanted to date again, speed or otherwise. But the point being that there were a lot of guys from the med school, proving that we either need help meeting girls, or know how to enjoy a free speed dating activity that OSU puts together for us. Hopefully the latter.

Conversations included: Possum tattoos, hitting on grade school teachers, far too many conversations about medical school, what color corn would be most profitable, power ties, far too many conversations about OH and NY, why I hate Chicago (which I don’t, I just had to get on her good side), why Europe looks awesome in movies, but not in real life, the movie Speed, the drug speed, speed reading, how dating people exclusively with your siblings’ names is creepy, why speed dating is capitalist, why speed dating is socialist, and why elephants are better than donkeys. I also called a girl obstinate, refused to buy another a drink, touched a girls ear and asked a couple about their lesbian tendencies.

Turns out, I can flirt. I’ve always been of the opinion that I don’t flirt, that I just talk to girls. But I just talked to the first couple girls, and realized that 3 minutes of me talking wasn’t getting the job done. I didn’t exactly say “Flirt mode activated” but looking back on my first 2 conversations versus my 20 some subsequent ones, there’s a definite difference.

Things that change talking into flirting:
1. First impression. I have a hard time flirting with people I already know. I think it being your first contact is an important element in making it flirting. Maybe it doesn’t have to be the exact first time you met, but I’d have a hard time flirting per se with a long time acquaintance. Flirting isn’t acting like your normal self, it’s a bit artificial, and someone that knows you well would be put off with a new Chris showing up one day.
2. Presenting. As I said, flirting is a bit artificial. It’s not the Chris that wakes up in the morning. It’s the Chris that is trying to make a presentation, a proposition. I’ve traditionally been against this. If I want a girl to like real Chris, why present them with SuperChris. They’re going to have to deal with normal Chris for the rest of their life. I can’t keep SuperChris going forever. So normally I don’t put on a presentation, I put normal Chris out there and they can decide if they like that. Is that lazy or honest? Probably both.

I’m sure I could analyze flirting for a great deal longer, but I won’t. Neurology isn’t going to study itself. If only.

** The lying in the post title refers to not posting before March, not lying to my speed dates. The only one I lied to was about hating Chicago, and we established at the beginning that I'd lie to help assuage her anger.