I’ll now impart on you who should win the Academy awards, despite the fact that I’ve seen very few of the contenders. A lack of knowledge has never kept me from having opinions before.
Best Picture
Little Miss Sunshine, with The Departed a close second. I’ve seen Sunshine and it was great; I only suspect that The Departed is great.
Best Director
Martin Scorsese for The Departed. I realize that the Oscars are based on individual achievements and not for life long work, but it was pretty ridiculous that Scorsese has never won for best director. I’m not a huge fan but there’s no question that he’s incredibly influential, very talented and deserves to have won at some point. I didn’t see this movie (I wanted to, but didn’t have the time) but I’m throwing him the Oscar anyway.
Best Actor
Forest Whitaker for Last King of Scotland. Go Ghost Dog!
Best Actress
Meryl Streep for Devil Wears Prada. I can’t say that I’m at all enthusiastic for this category. But Meryl is the only one that I saw perform, and she was amusing.
Supporting Actor
This is a hard one because I like each of these actors, but only some of the time. And since I didn’t get around to seeing most of these movies, I don’t know if I liked this particular performance. But Alan Arkin was very entertaining, despite single handedly making the movie R.
Supporting Actress
I considered heaping praise on Sunshine, but I’m not going to give the little girl this award. I’m morally opposed to giving awards to pre-teens. So I’m giving it to Rinko Kikuchi, who I hear is amazing in Babel.
Foreign Film
Pan’s Labyrinth. I haven’t seen it yet (perhaps this weekend) but I’ve been looking forward to this for six months. I love horror, I love fantasy, I like Del Toro. Go Pan.
Adapted Screenplay
I’m tempted to give this to Borat for it’s shear originality, but I don’t think it had that great of a screenplay. It was improvised; funny, but improvised. So I’ll give this to Children of Men, which should have had a best picture nomination.
Original Screenplay
Sunshine vs. Pan. Pan wins out, because I like writer/directors and because it’s a trippy film. That’s got to be hard to write.
Animated
I couldn’t care less. Where’s the anime? Stupid Academy Awards. I’m voting for Scanner Darkly.
Art Direction
I liked Good Shepard’s art, and I liked The Prestige’s as well. But Pan wins again.
Cinematography
Children of Men, all day long.
Sound Mixing and Sound Editing
No one cares, except for sound mixers and/or editors. But I feel bad the Apocalypto didn’t get more nominations so I’ll give it this.
Original Score
It wasn’t nominated, but Marie Antoinette gets its. Sorry nominated folks.
Original Song
I’m abstaining from this category. 3 songs from the same movie? This automatically disqualifies all of them. I won’t vote for Randy Newman. If I had to vote it would be for Melissa Etheridge by the process of elimination. But I’m not voting for her either.
Costume
Once I’ve seen Curse of the Golden Flower, I might vote for it. But for now I’ll go with Marie Antoinette. It was practically about the costumes.
Documentary
I think there’s little doubt that An Inconvenient Truth will win this. I think it also deserves it.
Editing
Children of Men. I think I have awarded it every category it was entered in.
Makeup
Pan again, though Apocalypto gets a close second.
Short Films
Haven’t seen any of them, haven’t heard of any of them. But one is called the Danish Poet, so it wins.
Special Effects
Superman Returns had some very cool effects. But Pirates had cool effects going 24/7. It was mediocre in every other way, but the effects were cool.
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