Who knew my Forever Lazy story would have a denouement?
So I ordered a pink Forever Lazy as a gag gift. Unfortunately when my 2 comedic pink body bags arrive, they are not medium sized bags, but instead XL blue ones. There's a note included saying in essence "We didn't have what you ordered in stock, so instead we gave you something else. Merry Christmas!" To their credit they did include a Snuggie, so I now have 3 useless things rather than 2.
It was a gag gift and the gag event has passed, so a normal person would let sleeping dogs lie. But I got out of work early and having nothing to do this afternoon so called up their customer service department. From them I received such gems as, and these are quotes not paraphrases: "Yes. Some of our customers are happy and some are not," "Our policy is that it is more important to get it to you by Christmas than to get the order 100% correct" (my order being 0% correct) and "If you hadn't opened the box you could have returned it without paying shipping and handling. (Me) Then I wouldn't have known that it contained the wrong items. (Her) Yes, that's true."
So rather than going to the post office, paying shipping and handling and waiting a 4-8 weeks for them to replenish their stock, then receiving comedic pink pjs, I got her to give me $20 back, and I'll keep these XL blue pjs. To be fair, the size of these XL versions, which according to the box will fit someone that is 6'5'' and 260 lbs, makes them fairly comedic as well.
But still, Forever Lazy, good job living up to your name.