Easy Cheese

Jim Gaffigan has a bit about Easy Cheese. Unfortunately I can’t find a video clip of it online, so I’ll have to paraphrase it. I realize of course that paraphrasing a standup bit renders it nearly humorless, but I see no way to avoid it. (Addendum: I found a audio sample of the clip here, but you still need the visual to do it justice: Spray Cheese ) Jim notes that people are incredibly lazy. How else can you explain Easy Cheese? People are so lazy that they don’t want to go through the tremendous hassle of eating cheese. Instead they want to move their finger ever so slightly, causing “cheese” to spray onto their plate/cracker/tongue.

It occurred to me today that I’m no different. Well, slightly different in that I realize Easy Cheese is pretty gross. But equally lazy. I opened my Google Reader and saw that I had 606 blog entries to read. 606 blog posts have been written either by people I like, or about things I like, and I’ve been too lazy to read them. I have to note here than none of you should be using Google Reader since that prevents me from counter-stalking you using Google Analytics, which I do. Which leads me this point: have I become precipitously less interesting since September began? Or did you all just discover Google Reader?

Admittedly, reading blog posts involves reading, which as a doctor I do get to count as working. So maybe I’m not horrendously lazy because I don’t get around to reading these blogs. But I’m also lazy enough that I don’t get around to watching videos. In years past I was a regular viewer of Homestarrunner, Ask a Ninja, Red Vs Blue and countless other silly internet videos. My first explanation would be that I’ve outgrown these shows, so no longer spend my precious time watching them. But when I do occasionally stumble across one of them during my surfing, I do think they’re funny. Perhaps not as funny as they were to 21 year old Chris, but still chuckleworthy. So the only conclusion is that I’m too lazy to nudge my finger a few times to bring myself to the site where I know the funny content to reside. Free of charge. On my computer, which is nearby 18 hours a day.

It’s just a flex of a finger, and I’m too lazy to partake of the metaphorical Easy Cheese. Though the metaphorical Easy Cheese may be as unhealthy as the Easy Cheese actual, so perhaps it’s for the best.