Bad Things

It was writing club again which means I actually have something to post. How novel! 

Here's a poem.

Bad Things

Your story may end grandly or full of woe,

What comes in each tale, no man can know.

Life is a great gift, all secretly wrappen

But many bad things can happen.

Another may covet your very fair face,

Be exiled amongst a half-human race,

Sick hired blades, give a poisonous dose,

Leaving you dead cold and comatose.

Many bad things can happen.

You may be infertile and fail in your trade,

Black or blue magics your sad shack invade,

Then enter a plague of self righteous vermin,

And eaten alive after much lying and sermon.

Many bad things can happen.

Your mother may die, then too your father,

Your ward may abuse, neglect, chore and bother.

Talking to rodents and in transparent garb clad

With stories of love royal and fairy: you’ll go mad.

Many bad things can happen.

You may by simpletons be apprehended,

Have many more progeny than intended,

Which are hunted by an evil, cruel and thin

That seeks to steal their spottled skin.

Many bad things can happen.

You may grow so dull that none can stand you,

Stuck alone in the woods, no human in view,

With other unwanted: stupid bears, scared swine,

Sad beasts of burden and rabbits that whine.

Many bad things can happen.

You may see and crave a lifestyle alternative,

Be deceived, disfigured, disabled, but live,

Your father abusive and later emasculated,

Yourself impersonated, your friends masticated.

Many bad things can happen.

You may be antisocial, choosing books over men,

held captive by a creature in his cavernous den,

Be wracked by worry, and catch a syndrome,

Clouding your judgment like those in Stockholm.

Many bad things can happen.

You may be born into hopeless lack,

Lying and stealing and wearing a sack.

Lying and bribing when suddenly wealthy,

Denied, shirtless, betrayed and unhealthy.

Many bad things can happen.

You may be born well, spoiled and well-fed,

Then have your kin either die or wish you dead,

Surviving on insects and other food pathetic,

Growing both more selfish and apathetic.

Many bad things can happen.

Indeed many bad things can happen and will,

This wrapped gift is flawed, but a great gift still.

Ever after will come, and can come happily,

But until that time, we each come to see

Many bad things can happen.

The concept of the poem was to take something happy and make it appear sad. Not to twist the actual story, just how it is perceived so it sounds tragic. In the end it's the same story, it ends up being happy, and you can see that it's happy despite the trials. So I used Disney stories and pointed out some of the bad things that happened. 

Key:

Snow White

Pinocchio

Cinderella

101 Dalmations

Winnie the Pooh

The Little Mermaid

Beauty and the Beast

Aladdin

The Lion King

Bonus:

The idea from the poem actually started with the Brave Little Toaster so here's the Toaster/Toy Story Stanza I cut:

You may never realize your toys are alive,

Ever watching as they scheme and connive,

You’d never be alone, not even in old age

Appliances stare and stalk at this stage.

Many bad things can happen.