One of my fondest memories is making several of my friends regurgitate. One night four of us were dining at the fine establishment known as The Spaghetti Warehouse. Admittedly, the fact that it was The Spaghetti Warehouse may have contributed to the regurgitation. But over the course of the night I was successfully able to make each of the other three laugh hard enough to cause them to spit, vomit or otherwise emit their food. It was a proud day.
I’d like to claim that the sheer magnitude of my wit caused this, but this was not really the case. It’s extremely difficult to keep up a string of jokes resulting in the loss of control of body function all on your own. The group included two of my more amusing friends. And with the momentum the three of us provided, I was able to capitalize. The four of us spent the night eating mediocre food, cracking each other up, and at times losing the mediocre food, and it was glorious.
Dates often pale in comparison. I love women, and enjoy the company of men considerably less than the average bloke. My use of the term bloke may contribute to this. But how often have I laughed uncontrollably on a date? I’d have to check my archives, but without doing the research, I’d say never.
For some reason, I’ve never thought to combine the crackup with the date, or at least to attempt to combine it. By and large, it’s because I don’t find women to be as funny as men. I’ve blogged for many years now and have covered the subject before and in more depth, but I think men tend to be funnier than women. I think it’s due to societal incentives more than inherent qualities, but it’s just there. I laugh at things men say and do much more often than what women say and do. And I’m sure part of it is that I’m a guy, and it’s not entirely that women aren’t funny, but that women aren’t funny to men.
In general, I’m in the business of removing criteria from my dating standards rather than adding them. That’s horrible advice for some people, but good advice for me. But I think I may need to add a criterion to my dating checklist. It’s not that funny women don’t exist, they’re just less common than funny men. But I like laughing. And I’d like dating more if I were laughing more. And what would be better than a couple who make each other vomit every once in a while.